Life of a Mercenary

[duke_of_hazard]

Damn, still no solid jobs from HQ! How the hell am I supposed to make some extra mint at this rate? The base salary ain't enough! Even Elaine must be having a meltdown somewhere. Is it too much to ask for a masked bishop who isn't also trying to kill us? At least he was generous with the potch, but who wouldn't be if they believed there won't be a tomorrow. Oh, well... no skin off my nose, as long as the 14th Unit still remains superior in Caleria. But for now, any of you wealthy scholarly types in need of a bodyguard?

Oh, and, crap... since when did we have albino bats and flying squirrels in our ranks? I know this place ain't no stranger to freaks and weirdos, but it's getting out of hand, right? Are we gonna have to hire pest control? I know at least one handsome fella who would be more than happy to "take care" of these critters, but for the right price. [ Pause. Is about to walk off, but stops to clarify. ] ... Me. That guy is me.