Unwanted Affiliations

[fierce_marauder]

[ Hervey is sitting on the side of the fountain, looking mighty exhausted. His right hand is covered in what appears to be ink, but you can just make out some purple-green bruising under the black smears. The pirate's cheeks also appear to have been smudged with the ink, although those marks are a little lighter. ]

How do they keep putting up all these damn signs?!

[ Next to him is a pile of wood with words painted haphazardly onto them, but it's hard to make out what they say considering most of the wood is broken into a variety of splintery, small pieces. ]

Geez, we should've just killed them or thrown them into jail or something! Next time I see them, I'm definitely taking them in...

Stupid Jeremy, could've easily happened to him but I just had to go and be the man...

Comments

[what_a_pain]

Botched arts and craft project?

[fierce_marauder]

More like a botched quest now! Y'know, the ones Moana listed?

You take one?

[what_a_pain]

A quest, huh? Which one did you sign up for?

I did...

[fierce_marauder]

The one with the 9999 potch reward that everybody said was dodgy, but I thought was value. Now these guys are running around shouting 'n painting my name everywhere! I'm a pirate, not some kinda' vandal!

[ He's ranting a bit. ]

Well, which one did you get?

[what_a_pain]

Guess that saying "too good to be true" is right sometimes. Should I ask what happened?

It's an investigation for someone.

[miss_matchmaker]

Ohh Sir Hervey! ♥ I read your quest report, it looks like you've made some lifelong friends!! Too bad about the reward though...

[fierce_marauder]

I hope they fall of a cliff, to be honest.

What, so we don't get a reward at all?

[miss_matchmaker]

Oh, you're such a joker! Hehe, that sense of humour is the reason you're all friends now, I bet!

Don't you feel kind of rewarded already?

[fierce_marauder]

... It wasn't a joke.

Not even a little bit. I'm running around trying to fix all the stupid crap that these guys are doing and we don't even get any dosh? Shouldn't you like, take some of their potch beforehand for these quests??

[aloof_savant]

Why Hervey, you've been busy. Should I be worried about you gunning for my position, too?

[fierce_marauder]

And be followed around by Agnes all day? Thanks, but no thanks.

I'm just trying to protect my reputation from these... these idiot bandits or whatever around here. I'm even starting to wonder if I should change my name.

[aloof_savant]

Heh, and what is your reputation that you're trying to protect? A pirate with no ship? Sounds like a regular bandit to me.

[fierce_marauder]

Just a man's reputation at this point! How would you feel if someone just kept runnin' around callin' you Dirty Caesar?

[flowingstrike_loser]

Looks like somebody's been busy.

Without all those signs, how do you expect everyone to learn about your new friends?

[fierce_marauder]

You mean your new lover?

[flowingstrike_loser]

W-wait. They're not writing that somewhere are they?!

[fierce_marauder]

[ ROLLING WITH THE PUNCHES. ]

Sure they are. I've been a good pal and I've been taking 'em down, but you've gotta get onto this, man. Help me out, here.

[innkeeper_erin]

Trying to guess some of the words on the small pieces of wood

Dir...ty?

[fierce_marauder]

Nope. Definitely not 'dirty'!

How's it going, Erin? Heard you were in a play recently.

[innkeeper_erin]

It isn't? I thought it's related to your 'boys', so...

Oh! Yes. It went in an unexpected way but the audience like it, so I made it anyway.

[fierce_marauder]

Nope! No boys. I have no boys. No boys at all!

Who were you playing? Never knew a cute girl like you would have such actin' chops, y'know?

[belfar_agent]

Living up to the new moniker, I see. We get it, you could at least wash your face!

[fierce_marauder]

Geez, sorry, princess! Is my face too dirty for your delicate eyes or something?

[belfar_agent]

Yes, patronize the only person who isn't laughing at you right now. Hmph.

It's dirty, period. You don't have to be royalty to be honest about something!

[fierce_marauder]

... Yeah, you're right.

It'd be a waste of time for me to go wash my face and then go deal with more signs just t'get it all dirty all over again, though.